On my "Golden Birthday" a letter to myself for ages 21, 25 and 29

Michelle,
  Happy Birthday! I know you love this day :) Momma always made a HUGE deal about your Birthday , after all, you were her only baby. she would have called at 12:01.

You're 21- You ordered your first glass of wine out like a big girl !  LOL Drank it, ate a huge dinner , called your mom, got flowers and went home with your fiance. He was sweet.
 You get married this year. Beautiful wedding and awesome time with your family. Your Mom dies this year Michelle. You'll be alone with her and your heart will stop when you see she's not breathing, you'll go stand beside her and wait. This will be the hardest year of your life. You will try you hardest to be strong and hold it together but your world crashes down around you. You buy your first house this year and you and your husband lose the house within a year thanks to layoffs. You are angry with God , angry with your husband, angry in general. You're medicated and cannot sleep.

You're 25- Happy Birthday. You're emotionally better this birthday. Thank goodness.  You're pregnant this birthday! WITH A BABY BOY :) His name is going to be Killian and he is going to be awesome! I know that you think right now you know how awesome he is going to be, but honestly, you can't even comprehend how much he will change your world. (side note: this Halloween you have two teeth pulled thanks to pregnancy and lay on the couch pissed because you are fat, pregnant and Halloween is your favorite and you cannot eat candy!!!) ..This is the year you get divorced Michelle. Your son is two months old and you get divorced. You're heartbroken. Being a single mom was not in your plans. You pick yourself up, move in with your amazing daddy and he helps you and your baby move forward with your lives.

You're 29 TODAY 10/29/2013- This is the year baby. You are now a happily married (for two years) mother of 3 (Killian 4 1/2, Kara 13 & Danielle 16) . And seriously for the first time in your life , HAPPY. Like realllllllllllly genuine happy and at peace. Thank you Jesus. The valley's make the mountains sooooo much sweeter but I'd go through all the valley's again knowing I had you there every second of every day since you formed me in the womb
".I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;your works are wonderful, I know that full well.. " Psalm 139:14

 I am so amazed by how God has worked in my life in my 20's. I lived through things I thought I would never ever ever survive. I was mad at God for taking my mom, I was bitter and mean,but something happened year 25 after my divorce and I will be forever grateful for whatever change it was that brought me closer to my Lord.  I am also so thankful for my sweet sweet Husband who is so precious and so full of grace, if I have ever met an angel in a person it would be him. seriously.